How can you get your ex back?
Everyone goes through breakup at least once, some of you are upset, some of you are panicking that you have lost not only the relationship but also the person you love so dearly. This is where I stop, *shake you* and say “do not worry! don’t panic”. Breakups are actually more common than you think they are and there is one guaranteed way to get your ex coming back to you – you may have heard of this tactic before. The tactic is called ‘No Contact‘ (NC).
You may wonder what NC is about and what it means. No contact as a tactic is pretty straight forward and can be used by anyone straight after their breakup; however this tactic only applies to you if you were the one who was dumped or the one who had more feelings invested into the relationship. The only thing you have to do in NC is simply not contact your ex girlfriend/boyfriend. This means take a step back and realize your ex partner no longer wants to be in a relationship with you, this is hard to take and to understand especially if its your first time breakup. What you must do is be okay with the breakup and say your good byes and move forward with your life.
On that same note this means you will have to stop being friends with this your ex; I can tell you now 99% of cases after breakup will not get their exes back by sticking around as friends simply because it is like telling your ex they can treat and keep you as second best while they seek a replacement. That replacement person may possibly be someone your ex has had in reserve for a while waiting in the wings.
So what does ‘No Contact’ do as a tactic? NC is for you to stay away from the ex so you can heal and move past all the emotional baggage you have now due to the breakup, sticking around the ex and being friends will only land you with friend zone and a further more damaged heart and feelings. You will be in the life of someone who is no longer in love with you and can play games with you or simply give you false hope of getting back together then not. You do not want to be in the position of seeing your ex dating a new person within a month or two because you will be upset about it and the new person will definitely have an advantage over you, in that case it is best to simply back off and not be friends. You will wreck any chances of future reconciliation if you don’t get out of your exes life and move forward with your own. Simply cut contact with them, realistically this is the only way you can move past it all.
The only time you should talk to the ex again is when they come back with a real reach (something that shows they want the relationship). Any “I miss you” texts or ones to do with a sex hookup are not considered real reaches of getting back together so do not reply to them. Use your best judgement of whether they wish to come back but let me tell you now some exes are very smart at this kind of thing. Protect yourself in NC and heal.
NC will not only allow you to heal but to grow as a person and overcome the pain, breakup is inevitable for many simply because relationships are tough; In that sense I would simply avoid blaming each other, accept you werent compatible as a couple and simply take any responsibility for any mistakes you made and move on. Do not make your ex out to be someone perfect and feel sorry for yourself; simply allow your mindset to return to how it was before you met this person. In NC you must achieve the mindset of ‘I am over this person’ otherwise you will go back to an ex and simply make the same mistakes you did again and again like the first time. Really look at why the relationship ended during NC and figure out why it ended, once you know why that is what you have to work on along side your mindset of getting over it all. Before you can have a new relationship with any ex you must correct the mistakes of the previous relationship and trust me this is a two sided affair, there is no one person better than the other, it is simply up to each person in the past relationship to find out where they went wrong and work on it.
The answer to getting your ex back lies in where you value yourself and looking at the problems that caused the breakup in the first place, only when you find them can you realize what went wrong in the relationship. This is not so you can go back to your ex and fix it as this is almost like telling them you don’t mind being second best and then being disrespected in the process. You need to become more attractive and more compatible during the NC period and part of that is moving on, your mindset changes when you move on and thus you become more attractive, still don’t get it? I don’t expect you to. Care less about the relationship you had with the ex and perhaps you will find out what i mean. Staying in their life is just giving them the chance to disrespect you further by both stringing you along and by finding a nice replacement for you, how will you feel when that happens? It doesn’t matter if your ex is ‘nice’ or because you trust them more than a stranger because you have lost the relationship and impressing exes does not work, it just pushes them further away.
IT is not manipulation to do No Contact (NC) it is called ‘choosing to be happy rather than miserable’. Why be second best? The answer to getting your ex back is YES and NO but being a pushover and allowing the ex to both disrespect you and put you in the waiting queue is like sacrificing your happiness for your ex to be happy while you suffer.
Your breakup starts here but if you keep busy and set new goals in your life you will move on faster. You ask me “why move on when I am trying to get the ex back?”. Well this question is easily answered, do you lose anything from moving on? OR are you simply hanging/clinging to hope of someone that makes you feel good in a fake way? Once the ex is no longer in your life its time to see the reality: you now have to live alone and realize there is also a chance the ex may not come back, be prepared for it. Keep strong guys and girls. If you have any questions please feel free to drop me a comment and I will help you find the best direction for your situation. Otherwise you can also go to my blog http://getrelationshipadvicehere.wordpress.com for more information on this topic, Thanks!